Sleeping toward Perfection

Sleep is an ever present, but absolutely necessary part of our lives. It rejuvenates our bodies, keeps our brains healthy and gives us a needed break from the hassles of daily life. For these reasons, sleep is something we all look forward to. A good night's sleep is a chance to reboot our human computing system, leading to better, faster performance.

Sleeping is a way for us to connect to the other people or animals in our lives. It can also be an opportunity to withdraw from the company of others and have much needed private time. Nevertheless, many people greatly enjoy sleeping with their pets, providing feelings of warmth and camaraderie. Others sleep with spouses, fiancées, or significant others, making their relationships even closer and more meaningful. The decision to sleep together is always an important step in any romantic relationship.

Sleeping also gives us a change to have dreams and nightmares, which serve their necessary purposes for our lives. They are our subconscious minds giving us messages about how we need to live healthier lives or to treat other people in our lives with the respect that they deserve. Dreams also serve as force for creativity, in endeavors that include art, music, writing, etc. We then wake up refreshed, inspired and ready to take on the day with ideas for making it in this world. In my daily life, dreams make some pretty damn good stories!

A bedroom's atmosphere is either conducive to sleep, or it is not. Many people need to improve the appearance and organization of their bedrooms in order to feel more comfortable in them. In other words, some adults are too messy for their own good! They can unwittingly be creating a physical environment that makes them sadder and more depressed. With limited space and a tendency to collect odds and ends throughout their lives, many people have bedrooms that are cluttered or untidy. Thus, many adults need to "go clean their rooms!"

Our bedding is important due to our personal preferences and to its effect on the quality of our sleep. This does not just include mattresses and box springs, but also sheets, blankets and pillows. I, for example, prefer soft mattresses to firm ones, but someone else may want to sleep on one as hard as a rock! I also like it cool enough in my bedroom to be able to pull the sheets and blanket up around my neck; I just like the feeling of being covered.

We all have our own personal preferences and touches when it comes to our sleep. Nowhere is this more apparent than in what we wear to bed. Our sleepwear ranges from pajamas to nothing at all, reflecting our place in life. I like to wear pajamas; underwear alone just feels too weird for me. What we wear to bed is also dependent on the climate of our region, the season of the year and who may or may not see us in sleepwear. Plan for your own comfort and that of those who share your home or apartment.

One-third of our lives is heavily influenced by the question of whether we sleep alone or with someone else. This defines both our physical and emotional space, as well as our desires and self-image. While sleeping with others can be intimate, it does have its pitfalls. You often have one person, for example, who hogs the blankets or takes up too much space in the bed. When a relationship sours, one person always ends up sleeping on the couch, which is one insult away from being booted out the door!

Human beings often experience difficulty when they sleep at different places. These individuals range from business travelers to homeless individuals without any fixed address. Some people stay with family, always feeling like a bothersome guest or bouncing back and forth between dwellings of multiple relatives. It's always a little awkward being a guest! To quote Grace Slick, "friends, baby, they treat you like a guest."

  

Sleep is not always easy and effortless; sometimes it can be difficult for people. Many have personal sleep issues that involve snoring, night terrors, violent nightmares or grinding one's teeth during the night. Others have outdoor noises to put up with, such as barking dogs. Sometimes people have difficult neighbors to contend with, ending up like Elaine Bennes in the Seinfeld episode with the ever-barking dog. I myself have had a fitful combination of violent nightmares and teeth-grinding. For this very reason, I even had to have a root-canal in 2012; my enamel had been completely worn away!

Many Americans don't get enough sleep in their lives; it should take up 8 hours, or one-third of their day. They may have insomnia, which causes them to need sleep medication on a regular basis. Other people wake up during the night and have trouble falling back to sleep. They may spend time reading or watching TV, which can be too distracting for the person. Often, people don't have enough time to devote to sleep, due to vigorous work schedules. More than a few people go to bed too late on a weeknight, glued to TVs and computer screens.

Too much sleep can be as bad as too little, especially for those suffering from depression or other forms of mental illness. I myself am guilty of this, due to my recent bout of depression, though I mostly overcame this tendency of mine. Oversleeping will make anyone more tired and constantly feeling that they need a lot of sleep. At the end of the day, it actually makes your depression worse and helps you gain a lot of weight, creating numerous other health problems. Instead, take a walk or find some other productive activity!

For women and men starting or expanding their families, their sleep is greatly impacted by pregnancy and children. Sleeping difficulties are associated with pregnancy, because it's the body's way of preparing the woman for motherhood. For parents of infants, it is quite a challenge to get some sleep while caring for an infant. Unfortunately, parents tend to get somewhat used to a lack of sleep. It helps create the relentless stress that adults experience in their 30s and 40s.

Even as the children get older, it can still be hard sleeping with children in the house. Young children sometimes sleep in their parents' bed, or a child will freak out when they have a nightmare. As a kid, I would often have nightmares and wake my parents up! It's also difficult for parents to sleep when they worry about their adolescent or young adult children. They always fear getting the dreaded call during the middle of the night. For most of my 20s, I was that young adult, staying out all night or fumbling for my house key at 2:37 a.m.

Unfortunately, many people in America today are forced to sleep in some very harsh circumstances. These include the military (especially in time of war), prisons/police stations, abusive homes, or sleeping during a violent storm. Prisons are especially rough for sleeping because inmates get rudely awaken by corrections officers for bed checks or body searches. Unfortunately, sleeping in an abusive household is all too common in America today. There is a lot of anger and aggression in society that needs to be cured.

  

Sleep is often adversely impacted by noise outside the home, as well as factors inside the home or just in the person's head. They may hear cars on a busy street, car alarms, loud drunks walking by their house or apartment (if they live near a bar or nightclub as I once did), fireworks, or other noises. In some areas, people always think that it's the 4th of July, setting off industrial-strength fireworks! These are often inconsiderate assholes who live outside the law. Over time, though, people get used to such noises and can usually sleep through them.

Sleeping will cure a lot of life's problems, though it can create some new ones. It gives us what we need to rest our minds and always be at our best. Sleep is a bastion of comfort and stability, in a world of discomfort and chaos. Many of us have sleeping difficulties or related mental health issues, but we can all work to solve these problems in our lives. We can truly make the necessary changes so that we can sleep toward perfection!

Radical Reads for Revolution

As you all know by now, I have always been an avid reader. I enjoy reading just about anything under the sun, including my share of radical books. I love picking up a controversial read that I shouldn't be looking at. Learning new information from a variety of sources is something I have a passion for. Many of these works can be found in libraries and bookstores, especially smaller, independent bookstores such as the Quadrant in Easton. We all enjoy absorbing forbidden knowledge. There is a reason why the DaVinci Code and 50 Shades of Gray are so popular!

There is always a human need to defy authority. We all want to reject the personal domination that authority represents, so rebellion is often supremely satisfying; it also exposes us to many important truths about life and ourselves. When we look at every viewpoint and idea, we can refine our own enlightened viewpoint, supported by many informed opinions. Forbidden fruit truly can open our eyes!

Society's authority figures have always tried to suppress learning and inquiry because they fear what people will discover. From the 16th to 20th centuries, the Roman Catholic Church maintained its Index of Forbidden Books, because it recognized that free thought and discussion posed a threat to the authoritarian power it wielded over much of Europe and the Americas. Indeed, the books on the list did benefit humanity by challenging the church's power, first with Protestantism, then with the Enlightenment, leading to capitalism, science, socialism, technology and secularism. Independence and autonomy do benefit the vast majority of people!

We also don't learn anything of value when we fail to question the assumptions and premises held by most people. The "tyranny of the majority" is nowhere more visible than in the public exchange of ideas and information. We become smartest and wisest when we think for ourselves; we do this by questioning conventional wisdom, as well as dogmas promoted by "authorities." The best way to think for ourselves is to use our reasoning abilities and always to remain curious and inquisitive. That is why the "inquisitive" hobbits of the Shire were the most successful halflings in Tolkien's Middle Earth.

Radical and forbidden books also cover topics that everyone thinks about, but can't discuss with anyone. They truly can be our guilty pleasures that we enjoy after a long day! Everything in life is a game; we all want to learn the rules of the game, but we aren't allowed to mention the game's existence, so we must rely on hidden sources of information. Some are better than others at playing life's games; in fact, some play it too well! You all have met life's "players."

The Sociopath Next Door (2005) by Dr. Martha Stout of Harvard Medical School explores the darkest side of these games and the very darkest characters who play them. Dr. Stout shows us that many in our midst are sociopaths - they have Anti-Social Personality Disorder, a permanent lack of conscience and normal, healthy human emotions. She discusses how these individuals cause a great deal of suffering in our lives, but can often be avoided if we can identify them. We all have sociopaths present in our lives to some degree (i.e. abusive boyfriends, scam artists, nightmare bosses, etc.). Unfortunately, they also tend to dominate every society known to man.

            Stout argues that Anti-Social Personality Disorder is entirely genetic and that sociopaths are born that way. I tend to disagree, in that I think violent sociopaths are influenced by genetic, as well as environmental factors, such as childhood abuse, substance abuse issues, etc. Psychology is a new science and, while her study of sociopathy is enlightening, her treatment of the disorder may be too simplistic and generalized. She is right, however, in relating how we all have people in our lives whom we'd rather avoid, who scare us by their very presence, and who violate the rights of everyone around them.

Real social change is impossible if people don't think independently, and critical thinking isn't enough. One needs to delve into the details of their new findings: social media posts alone can't be used to form opinions as readers need to dig deeper and find the facts behind the news stories or postings. This will make an individual less vulnerable to bad information. A person's life lesson should be merely an introduction to their new area of expertise; it should work like Wikipedia does when it steers us to more reputable online sources. A rational, skeptical mind, armed with lots of information, makes us confidently powerful in a way that helps people we care about.

We obviously won't agree with everything that we read, but these points of disagreement will only sharpen our well-informed opinions. Other obscure works will just have entertainment value. For example, I detest Charles Manson and his murderous activities, but his biography kept my attention. It contained sex, murder, drugs, music, unique subcultures and radical ideas; what other else could you want! We definitely need to feed the dark side of our collective psyche.

 

It's always fun to read about the bad people of history because we defiantly indulge our deepest, darkest fantasies. In my experience, people who avoid fantasy and other creative entertainments often indulge any sadistic urges by lashing out at the other people in their lives. Boring, judgmental individuals tend to treat others the worst. As Miley Cyrus said, "people who are too nice are secretly psycho." By seeing how badly off-track people can become, we gain the will and insight to reign in our own vices and shortcomings.

Jeff Guinn meets this common need with his biography of Charles Manson. In Manson: The Life and Times of Charles Manson (2013), he presents a gripping, comprehensive biography of a diabolical mass killer who haunted the American psyche at a tumultuous time in history, and who continues to captivate the public imagination. Everyone loves to learn more about Charles Manson, whether it's online, on TV or in a book! His story was worthy of any soap opera or tabloid, as it contained orgiastic sex, gruesome violence, radical thought and contemporary politics.

Human animals are sexual beings, so we had best find media that explore this part of everyday life. Most of us consume such material from a variety of media types. However, sex in print form is often as erotic as glamour photographs and adult videos; sexy stories tie raw human emotions to realistic sex acts. Sometimes, these sexual situations are actually taken from real life, in the case of autobiographical works. This is most exciting and titillating for me, especially when it comes to hippies or other Bohemian groups.

Memoirs of a Beatnik explored this sexual reality when it was written in 1969 by Diane diPrima, a long-time bohemian and former member of the Beat Generation. di Prima wrote an X-rated account of her life as part of the Beat Generation, at the movement's greatest extent in the early-to-mid 1950s. I first read the sex scenes from the book, indulging my lust when I was 17, at Dreamscape Comics. I loved the raunchy eroticism of it.

            More recently, I spotted the book at the Bethlehem library and re-read it, focusing more on elements of Beat culture contained in the story. It augmented my body of knowledge about the Beat Generation. Diane di Prima is still alive and in her 80s. She has written numerous books since Memoirs and taught in the college setting throughout the years. Her daughter, Dominique di Prima, is a radio star and activist for African-American issues in the Los Angeles area.

We on the left approach radical texts with a discerning, skeptical mind, in contrast with right-wingers who believe their reactionary reads word for word, as they prepare to convert the world to their dogmas. This is why true progressives rarely carry out acts of violence; we think things through and approach each passage of a radical book with a critical and skeptical mind. For example, I could read Mein Kampf and not be tempted to join a neo-Nazi group.

One such book that is a favorite of mine is Fugitive Days by Bill Ayers. It is a 2001 book in which Former 60's radical Bill Ayers discusses his activities as a leader of The Weather Underground, a revolutionary group that was part of the New Left of the 1960s and 70s. Despite being a man who committed some heinous acts, he is very intelligent and empathetic. Ayers is a great thinker who has some wonderful ideas for human society. He went on to revolutionize the field of education and eventually become a notable expert on the subject. Even the guilt of his past criminal acts was mitigated by the intense societal conflict of the period, caused by bad leadership and many pre-existing prejudices in American society. People are complicated, and a person's one very bad deed may be offset by a number of good deeds, along with a general desire for good.

Every viewpoint needs to be heard, especially if it is from a person marginalized by mainstream society. Such a person often has a wealth of wisdom gained by having the courage to stand up for themselves and their identity. People excluded from mainstream society best understand how society operates, because they are on the outside looking in, having a bird's eye view. Advanced wisdom and understanding of society, for example, help to explain the contributions of African-Americans to American music, from jazz to hard rock.

 

In conclusion, we all enjoy reading obscure works that arouse opposition and make us think. We learn a great deal about ourselves and the world around us. This newfound knowledge will help us to better play any game that is part of our lives. Finally, when we can use new thinking to benefit ourselves, we put ourselves in a better position to help others and transform our world into a more progressive, loving and tolerable place.